I was thinking a lot about interactions that I have with certain people.
Typically these people are older than me. They are amazing and intelligent people. Yet, I am always getting the feeling that they need you to practically fawn over them for them to share their knowledge.
It is like I don't deserve their input unless I worship them first.
Can't we both just be adults? Can you accept that I appreciate your experience and wisdom (I wouldn't be asking you for input if I didn't) without all that extra fluff? And, please don't be rude to me if I choose not to do the worship thing!
I have enough on my hands maintaining my own weak self-esteem, I don't really have to bolster yours too, do I?
I hope in 20 years I am more adjusted than you are now. (Actually I think I just might already be...)
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Sickness runs amok
So...wow..i have been really bad at posting...
work is really keeping me busy...i have this super big project that I had to have pretty much spec'ed out before my vacation and it has been taking my focus and creativity...
Our vacation starts on Friday! We can't WAIT! We are flying to south FL - Gulf side - to stay at a resort my seester manages...
Well I can sort of wait - because
How do you pack for a 6 month old baby? Just how much money am I going to be spending in checked baggage? We couldn't drive - the Zerker HATES being in the car too long unless she falls asleep....My cousin lives down there and a friend of hers is letting us borrow a stroller. We have to check the car seat...and the rest we will just wing...Zerker is pretty good at sitting without the boppy, she can sleep in her carseat or we can set up pillows around her on the floor...or I could rent a pack n play - or I could buy one on craigslist...
Oh and there is the fact that, um, I haven't been able to eat anything but chicken broth and ice cream since Saturday. My throat feels like it got stuck in a garbage disposal, and my fever finally left....I am on antibiotics and I think it will pass - but darn I really want to be totally well for our vacation...nadie doesn't have any more vacation days left because of the week zerker was born...
Oh and the Zerker had her first ear infection and was on antibiotics
Oh and she got her first tooth.
Oh and she is eating solid foods.
All of this happening when my new job is going full force...
Um...can you say crazy life?
ouch - not gonnna say anything...
work is really keeping me busy...i have this super big project that I had to have pretty much spec'ed out before my vacation and it has been taking my focus and creativity...
Our vacation starts on Friday! We can't WAIT! We are flying to south FL - Gulf side - to stay at a resort my seester manages...
Well I can sort of wait - because
How do you pack for a 6 month old baby? Just how much money am I going to be spending in checked baggage? We couldn't drive - the Zerker HATES being in the car too long unless she falls asleep....My cousin lives down there and a friend of hers is letting us borrow a stroller. We have to check the car seat...and the rest we will just wing...Zerker is pretty good at sitting without the boppy, she can sleep in her carseat or we can set up pillows around her on the floor...or I could rent a pack n play - or I could buy one on craigslist...
Oh and there is the fact that, um, I haven't been able to eat anything but chicken broth and ice cream since Saturday. My throat feels like it got stuck in a garbage disposal, and my fever finally left....I am on antibiotics and I think it will pass - but darn I really want to be totally well for our vacation...nadie doesn't have any more vacation days left because of the week zerker was born...
Oh and the Zerker had her first ear infection and was on antibiotics
Oh and she got her first tooth.
Oh and she is eating solid foods.
All of this happening when my new job is going full force...
Um...can you say crazy life?
ouch - not gonnna say anything...
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
5 Months
She already looooved her feet....guess what she realized she can do now?
The Zerker is five months old today. She celebrated by sucking on her toes. And, of course, she practiced vocalizing (shrieking) as loud and high as she could. :)
She started at the daycare yesterday. She seems to like it. And, it seems to really wear her out. She comes home, needs a nap (even though she has had her daily naps - and usually has eaten), has a few pleasant hours and is ready for bed.
She is amazing...All is well....
The Zerker is five months old today. She celebrated by sucking on her toes. And, of course, she practiced vocalizing (shrieking) as loud and high as she could. :)
She started at the daycare yesterday. She seems to like it. And, it seems to really wear her out. She comes home, needs a nap (even though she has had her daily naps - and usually has eaten), has a few pleasant hours and is ready for bed.
She is amazing...All is well....
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Wishing I could Freeze Frame....
It has been a month and I haven't written one post.
I go through these phases, from one extreme to the next sometime, I guess.
And while I have been keeping up on my friends blogs (maybe not commenting as much), I think I bit off a bit more than I could chew with my google reader and I just can't keep up. Argh! You mean I can't raise a 4.5 month old baby, work full time, manage a household, do fun things with my family on the weekends AND ready 200+ regular bloggers? Nope - I guess I exceeded my limitations.
Sooooo much has been happening over the past month.
I have tons of re-caps....
4 month old well baby visit and immunizations. Zoe was super healthy and growing like a weed. 75th percentile in height, 60th in weight and 50th in head size....reaching beyond expectation in strength and capability...
Zoe had her first sicky. :( She still is a little congested. She was never full on sick and never needed to go to the doctor, but she got her first cough from her daddy and got congested. She never seemed fussy about it.
We went to Chicago for a cubs game a few weekends ago. The in-laws were in town and came with us. Zoe got to meet her grandpa(daddy side) for the first time. Zoe was a trouper and we had a great time with the BEST pizza from Gino's East. Last year we had Giradanos and Ginos was just sooo much better for some reason.
Zoe visited the woods twice. She met my good friend Rosa.
My sister sang the National Anthem at the Indianapolis 500 race this past sunday. Nadie and I got to go to the race with my family. My cousin watched the Zerker. We had a great time, but I missed my baby.
This past week the Zerker seems to be teething very hard. Friday was the fussiest day of her life...I hate to see her in pain. I can feel teeth poking through, but I feel like there is very little I can do. I give her cool teething rings, frozen wash cloths, anything to get her through the worst of it.
In sad news, Zerker's awesome caregiver on the days of the week that I go into the office has some other important priorities that mean that she can't watch her anymore. We visited the daycare and made a deposit. Their are pros and cons to it. It is much closer to our house. It will give her a chance to socialize with other babies. But, it felt a lot more institutional than I would prefer. She will be exposed to a lot more germs. We have to get special Drs orders to keep her on the same formula. We tried her out on the kind that they give in the daycare and it seemed really make her tummy hurt. She will not get so much individual care. We can always switch to a different place or a home care if it doesn't work.
She is getting SOOO big and SOOO strong. She can sit up by herself for several seconds now. She is trying new things out all the time. I am so impressed with her. She has gone to two baseball games (one was a minor league) and managed really well.
I love her so much it hurts. I saw my niece Bree graduate last weekend. It was sort of surreal. Bree was the first baby that I was around and babysat. The years fly and I am so scared that I will blink and it will be the Zerker in a cap and gown. On the otherhand...I am loving watching her grow and learn...So happy...
I go through these phases, from one extreme to the next sometime, I guess.
And while I have been keeping up on my friends blogs (maybe not commenting as much), I think I bit off a bit more than I could chew with my google reader and I just can't keep up. Argh! You mean I can't raise a 4.5 month old baby, work full time, manage a household, do fun things with my family on the weekends AND ready 200+ regular bloggers? Nope - I guess I exceeded my limitations.
Sooooo much has been happening over the past month.
I have tons of re-caps....
4 month old well baby visit and immunizations. Zoe was super healthy and growing like a weed. 75th percentile in height, 60th in weight and 50th in head size....reaching beyond expectation in strength and capability...
Zoe had her first sicky. :( She still is a little congested. She was never full on sick and never needed to go to the doctor, but she got her first cough from her daddy and got congested. She never seemed fussy about it.
We went to Chicago for a cubs game a few weekends ago. The in-laws were in town and came with us. Zoe got to meet her grandpa(daddy side) for the first time. Zoe was a trouper and we had a great time with the BEST pizza from Gino's East. Last year we had Giradanos and Ginos was just sooo much better for some reason.
Zoe visited the woods twice. She met my good friend Rosa.
My sister sang the National Anthem at the Indianapolis 500 race this past sunday. Nadie and I got to go to the race with my family. My cousin watched the Zerker. We had a great time, but I missed my baby.
This past week the Zerker seems to be teething very hard. Friday was the fussiest day of her life...I hate to see her in pain. I can feel teeth poking through, but I feel like there is very little I can do. I give her cool teething rings, frozen wash cloths, anything to get her through the worst of it.
In sad news, Zerker's awesome caregiver on the days of the week that I go into the office has some other important priorities that mean that she can't watch her anymore. We visited the daycare and made a deposit. Their are pros and cons to it. It is much closer to our house. It will give her a chance to socialize with other babies. But, it felt a lot more institutional than I would prefer. She will be exposed to a lot more germs. We have to get special Drs orders to keep her on the same formula. We tried her out on the kind that they give in the daycare and it seemed really make her tummy hurt. She will not get so much individual care. We can always switch to a different place or a home care if it doesn't work.
She is getting SOOO big and SOOO strong. She can sit up by herself for several seconds now. She is trying new things out all the time. I am so impressed with her. She has gone to two baseball games (one was a minor league) and managed really well.
I love her so much it hurts. I saw my niece Bree graduate last weekend. It was sort of surreal. Bree was the first baby that I was around and babysat. The years fly and I am so scared that I will blink and it will be the Zerker in a cap and gown. On the otherhand...I am loving watching her grow and learn...So happy...
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Namesake
The weekend before last we visited my lovely alma mater. It was dreary outside, but Providence was at work - because lots of people that I really wanted to expose the Zerker to were there....
The E in Zerker comes from a very special person.
One of those people you meet and you are blown away.
When I was a wee one of 18 I visited SMWC. The first teacher I met, the first Sister of Providence I met, the first real person of my beloved college was Ellen.
And over the next four years we formed a wonderful bond.
She became my academic advisor, professor, work study supervisor, and most importantly, friend. You know when you go through that phase and you don't connect with your parents anymore? She was the one mentor I connected to then that I knew woud love me no matter what. I feel like I learned about unconditional love from her.
And through the years we have maintained that friendship.
Of course, we don't have the time to sit in her office and wax poetically about my latest college girl frustration, we do keep in touch. She was my 'Sister Companion' on my journey to become a Providence Associate.
I cannot express how much it means to me that she has made herself so available to me on this journey. She is the definition of why you designate a namesake.
(oh and this summer...she celebrates her Golden Jubilee...50 years devoted to Providence...amazing....)
The E in Zerker comes from a very special person.
One of those people you meet and you are blown away.
When I was a wee one of 18 I visited SMWC. The first teacher I met, the first Sister of Providence I met, the first real person of my beloved college was Ellen.
And over the next four years we formed a wonderful bond.
She became my academic advisor, professor, work study supervisor, and most importantly, friend. You know when you go through that phase and you don't connect with your parents anymore? She was the one mentor I connected to then that I knew woud love me no matter what. I feel like I learned about unconditional love from her.
And through the years we have maintained that friendship.
Of course, we don't have the time to sit in her office and wax poetically about my latest college girl frustration, we do keep in touch. She was my 'Sister Companion' on my journey to become a Providence Associate.
I cannot express how much it means to me that she has made herself so available to me on this journey. She is the definition of why you designate a namesake.
(oh and this summer...she celebrates her Golden Jubilee...50 years devoted to Providence...amazing....)
Monday, April 27, 2009
Perfect Moment Monday - Cataract Falls
Lori says that Perfect Moment Monday is not about creating moments, but noticing them.
Sometimes, though, I can feel these moments being created...not intentionally...or even by me...I did not make the sun shine this weekend...I only saw that it was coming and took advantage of the situation...
So this weekend Nadie and I took the Zerker to Cataract Falls. I love going here because it is simple beauty. It is not part of a large park, and there are only a few things to do there. There is just enough to fill a Saturday afternoon.....
We ate a picnic lunch.
Looked at the big waterfall.
Looked at the Covered Bridge.
Drove down to the lower falls and walked the trail in a loop twice in our new Jogging stroller (I am totally stoked that I got this stroller for $45 at a garage sale).
There were so many beautiful things to look at.
And by that time we were all pooped and ready to go home.
And it was good.
It was an afternoon of perfect moments. Even the time when the Zerker was crying on the way to the car before the walk because she wanted a bottle and had a dirty diaper. Her cries are getting so character-like. You would think she was experiencing a major life crisis whenever she decides that she desperately needs a bottle or changed right this instant....My 'oh no! mommy must fix it!' feelings are turning into holding back laughter because she seems so dramatic. Not that I want to hear it for long periods of time...but that doesn't happen too often.
Sometimes, though, I can feel these moments being created...not intentionally...or even by me...I did not make the sun shine this weekend...I only saw that it was coming and took advantage of the situation...
So this weekend Nadie and I took the Zerker to Cataract Falls. I love going here because it is simple beauty. It is not part of a large park, and there are only a few things to do there. There is just enough to fill a Saturday afternoon.....
We ate a picnic lunch.
Looked at the big waterfall.
Looked at the Covered Bridge.
Drove down to the lower falls and walked the trail in a loop twice in our new Jogging stroller (I am totally stoked that I got this stroller for $45 at a garage sale).
There were so many beautiful things to look at.
And by that time we were all pooped and ready to go home.
And it was good.
It was an afternoon of perfect moments. Even the time when the Zerker was crying on the way to the car before the walk because she wanted a bottle and had a dirty diaper. Her cries are getting so character-like. You would think she was experiencing a major life crisis whenever she decides that she desperately needs a bottle or changed right this instant....My 'oh no! mommy must fix it!' feelings are turning into holding back laughter because she seems so dramatic. Not that I want to hear it for long periods of time...but that doesn't happen too often.
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